FAKE TRADE ALERT: THE NEWEST TIMBROWOLF

My Minnesota Timberwolves fandom dates back to the summer of 2014. You might remember that summer being big in NBA lore, as Lebron decided he was "Coming Home" (with the help of Sports Illustrated's Lee Jenkins). What transpired after that was Kevin Love agreeing to stick around in Cleveland and howdy-doody 2014 first overall pick Andrew Wiggins was in Minny.

I was a big fan of Kevin Love at the time--a round, rebounding machine for a decrepit team. I, too, at that time was a little chunkier and also had an affinity for collecting boards on the hardwood. Our games overlapped, then, to a degree. I enjoyed KLove's talents. But I was NOT going to transfer that fandom to the Cavs. This was pre-my great admiration for Lebron. I was still bitter over his Heatles affair. So I decided, somewhat ridiculously, "why not become a fan of the team that KLove just departed?"

I adopted the Wolves as my own. I got on board with Gorgui "The Gorgyle" Deng, Zach La-"Do It For the"-Vine, Nikola "Pek the Shrek" Pekovic, "Mo Money Mo Problems" Mo Williams, RRRRRRRRICCCKYYYYYY RRRRRRUUUUUUBIIOOOOO, Anthony Bennett, Chase Budinger, Kevin Martin, Shabazz Muhammad, and an over-the-hill, yet super sentimental prodigal son in KG.

That team sucked. They were garbage. Absolutely awful. 16-66. But at least it was fun rooting for a team to get the first lottery pick. And then they did! And then they drafted a generational talent perfect for the shifting landscape of the NBA in Karl-Anthony Towns, a player born the same day as my brother three years my junior. The future was now for my accepted bunch of losers!

Alas, times have a-changed. Now the future of the Wolves rests in the hands of a defense-first, screaming, leader of veterans in Tom Thibedeau, Leader of the Thiberwolves Pack. At point you have 30-year old Jeff Teague, who already has commandeered a 60-win team. On the wing is top 15 player in the league "Grimey Jimmy" Butler, a bona fide playmaker. And as previously stated down low there's stud big KAT. Ah but I forgot one.

Thank you, Andrew Wiggins. Thank you for being the first piece to help me believe in my new squad. Thank you for providing hope and a future. Thank you for your poster dunks and stuff. But it's time to move on from Andrew Wiggins. The young fella doesn't snag rebounds, he doesn't play great defense, and although he's still young, I personally just don't see him blossoming into the playmaker his new wingmate is.

So, how about this...

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Plus we'll throw in Minnesota's 2018 & 2019 first round picks going to New Orleans while the Pelicans' swap their 2018 second round pick via the Heat. In this way, New Orleans gets to hit the reset button a bit (...again. See Paul, Chris 2011) since they don't seem to be going anywhere with their Boogie/Brow combo and a bunch of miscasts around them.

New Orleans becomes Boogie's team and NO gets Wiggins back, plus another promising guard to pair with Jrue Holiday in Tyus Jones, not to mention an underrated big man in Gorgui Djeng. Or, if the Pelicans really want to blow it all up, they could always find a suitor for Cousins. Here are a couple throw-it-to-the-wall-and-see-if-it-sticks ideas:

• to Oklahoma City for Steven Adams, the Ilyasova and Sabonis trade exceptions and picks
• to the Wizards for some combination of Marcin Gortat, Markieff Morris, Kelly Oubre Jr., and picks
• to the Nets with Quinn Cook for Timofey Mozgov, Rondae Hollis-Jefferson, Andrew Nicholson, and picks

Minnesota addresses their need to win-now with a more stellar player in Davis who can play the same stretch-4 big role as Towns, giving Thibadeau the option of playing the two together at the same time and in the process giving opposing teams major headaches, or staggering the minutes of the two and, still, giving opposing teams headaches. I would be neglect to mention at this point in time that Towns and Davis are 21 and 24 respectively. So there's that too.

One might argue that this Wiggins-Davis trade doesn't make sense from the Pels' perspective, but I'm a Wolves fan. I'm not going to apologize for my bias. Go Wolves.